Does it hurt – in that space where the heart is, the seat of emotional torment and rapturous love? There is hardly a person who has not known pain since it is so intricately woven in the fabric of life, but the pain of broken relationships beats them all. The point is does the heart heal totally after turbulent times or do thorns bury deep and at treacherous turns prick deep and old wounds open?
To break a relationship or to make compromises to keep it going takes its toll. Whether its parent and child, husband and wife, brother and sister, lovers, or the near proverbial saas and bahu relationship, everything comes at a price. Emotional healing is often a necessity we overlook in the heat of life.
Sometimes tough decisions are required – especially when it’s a matter of deep faith or principles. You have to decide which road to take at the crossroad – and accept what comes along that path. Are you ready to convert your religion to marry somebody? Are you ready to sacrifice a scintillating career to be able to bring your children up with personal warmth and care? Are you ready to exchange your dream with your parents’? Choices. If you make them right you can avoid deep emotional scars. IF!
But being human we make choices that prove to be wrong in time. We are fallible and everything in the world changes. To think that we can go through life without error and pain is somewhat utopian. So, how to fill the wounds, ease the pain and yes, move on? The answer is simple but not easy – wisdom.
Wisdom is applied knowledge. Somewhere we carry a premise in our mind that pain can be avoided. Perhaps. But since a painless life is rare, the best option is to let go of past pain. Don’t resist pain when it comes, accept it and then let it drop. Don’t brood over it, thinking this is a deep cosmic conspiracy and you are singled out to suffer. Everyone suffers, but not everyone overcomes suffering. Wisdom lies in accepting what is natural – in this case both pain and healing.
To break a relationship or to make compromises to keep it going takes its toll. Whether its parent and child, husband and wife, brother and sister, lovers, or the near proverbial saas and bahu relationship, everything comes at a price. Emotional healing is often a necessity we overlook in the heat of life.
Sometimes tough decisions are required – especially when it’s a matter of deep faith or principles. You have to decide which road to take at the crossroad – and accept what comes along that path. Are you ready to convert your religion to marry somebody? Are you ready to sacrifice a scintillating career to be able to bring your children up with personal warmth and care? Are you ready to exchange your dream with your parents’? Choices. If you make them right you can avoid deep emotional scars. IF!
But being human we make choices that prove to be wrong in time. We are fallible and everything in the world changes. To think that we can go through life without error and pain is somewhat utopian. So, how to fill the wounds, ease the pain and yes, move on? The answer is simple but not easy – wisdom.
Wisdom is applied knowledge. Somewhere we carry a premise in our mind that pain can be avoided. Perhaps. But since a painless life is rare, the best option is to let go of past pain. Don’t resist pain when it comes, accept it and then let it drop. Don’t brood over it, thinking this is a deep cosmic conspiracy and you are singled out to suffer. Everyone suffers, but not everyone overcomes suffering. Wisdom lies in accepting what is natural – in this case both pain and healing.
-Harvinder Kaur
(Thursday, June 29, 2006 ; Reflexions; DNA)
(Thursday, June 29, 2006 ; Reflexions; DNA)
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